The question recently came up in
discussion about the worth of a submissive or slave, and whether or not having a sub really does make a Master’s life
easier. It is an interesting subject, and a challenge to find the answer.
What exactly is my worth to my Master
and what do i bring to His life? Do i make His life easier?
I had to think about this because
the answer is not as simple as it seems.
In material terms, i am not really
worth a lot – nor did i bring much to His life. A few pieces of furniture, some personal effects, an almost empty bank
account, and an old moth eaten teddy bear! i also believe i have brought Him many headaches and a lot of grey hairs!
In practical terms, i am worth about
the same as any other good submissive or slave. Doing dishes, making breakfast and lunch, keeping the house clean, and doing
the washing and any other household tasks, are things that any service submissive can do. These tasks which i perform every
day, make His life easier, and so bring a sense of order to His house.
Master and i also run a business,
and a BDSM social club, and i do much of the associated paperwork for both entities. I am worth the same as any good bookkeeper
or office assistant and i bring my skills in those areas to Him, which does indeed make His life easier. It frees Him from
the paperwork so that He can devote His time to the practical part of the business which is the manufacturing.
As for Chains – the social
club – i bring my communication and people skills, which again frees Him to concentrate on being the Host and making
sure everything runs smoothly. I look after the door, the entry fees and the enquiries etc – i do anything a good receptionist
or social club secretary would do.
But those things are not what the
essence of this article is about, the question asked has a much deeper meaning.
What is it that makes me different
to any other submissive Master has had in the past, or has now? Why did He choose me to share His life and His world?
When Master and i met for the very
first time, i was with another Dom, yet, there was an instant connection which we both felt, though i tried to ignore it at
first.
He has told me more than once that
He knew, from that very first time, that i would become His special girl, the one to share His life, the one who would be
collared and owned by Him.
As our relationship deepened, it
was obvious that it was more than just a Dom/sub dynamic, more than just a casual relationship based on D/s.
So what is it, what is the magic
ingredient, and what is it that i am worth?
That i bring love to His life is
without question, i love this Man more deeply than anyone ever in my life before. I am also secure in the knowledge that He
loves me with the same intensity.
So Love is something i bring to
Master’s life.
I am a totally upfront and honest
person, i do not tell lies and i have no hidden agendas. I am passionate about things i believe in, and am willing to stand
up and be counted.
So honesty, empathy and passion
are things i bring to Master’s life.
I bring companionship, We are together
almost all the time, we work from home, we socialise together, we eat and sleep together, and i adore being close to Him.
We even have fun going shopping
together, it’s the simple things in life, when shared with someone, that add the depth to the relationship.
So companionship is something i
bring to His life.
Master recently told me that i have
given Him confidence in some areas of His life, We don’t perceive Doms as needing confidence, Most Doms i know are extremely
confident and sure of themselves, so that comment came as a surprise to me.
Perhaps it is the encouragement
i give Him, urging Him to try something new, or to face a problem, that He would prefer to ignore.
Perhaps it is also the fact that
He has my unquestioning support in all facets of His life, whether it be business, pleasure, or family.
So, confidence is something i bring
to Master’s life.
As “first girl” in Master’s
family, it is my job to take some responsibility for the other submissives, to give them direction and tasks, and to field
their questions to Master when i can. I am the go between, which indeed makes His life easier as it is the little things i
can deal with so that He doesn’t have to bother.
However this is fraught with frustrations,
as quite often i am met with mild hostility and a refusal to allow me to do my job.
When it does work properly, i bring
ease of communication and smooth running of Master’s leather family to His life.
But there is still so much more
in the answer to this question of what i am worth.
I feel that with my continued submission
to Master, i also bring Him reassurance of His Dominance.
He sees that i learn from His guidance
and teaching, He has pride in my achievements, and my growing standing within the D/s community.
He sees other submissives coming
to me for support and advice, and sees my ability to help them – which comes from the lessons i learn from Him.
This brings Him the confidence and
the knowledge that He is Dominant, He is Master, and He is my owner.
Master needs my total submission
in order for His life to be complete.
The things i do each day reinforce
that fact to Him and to me.
Each morning, i serve His tea on
my knees and offer Him my collar to be put around my neck. This very act shows Him that
i am His submissive, offering myself to Him at the start of the day.
I am experienced enough to know
without Him telling me, how He likes His tea, how He likes His toast, and what medications He needs each morning with breakfast.
During the day, i will come to Him
with various questions and requests, all those interactions help to remind Him that He has a submissive in His life, in His
house, taking care of His world – with His permission of course!
I have learnt how He likes His lunch
to be presented.
I make sure His kitchen is clean
when it is time for Him to cook dinner.
It is those small things which bring
order to His life and make it easier.
I am fiercely protective of my
tasks which reinforce in my own mind, my submission. If i am doing something for Master, i do not wish to be helped or to
have it done for me. The task, whatever it may be, is MY service to Master, my task, my job, my submission. It fills me with
pride to serve Him in this way, and i bring my devotion to His life with my service to Him.
At night, i will sit at Master’s
feet, showing my total submission to Him.
At bed time, i will kneel in front
of my Master, i say my Mantra to Him, and then kiss His feet as a reminder to myself and Him that i belong to Him, that i
am in my place at His feet, on my knees.
He removes my collar for bed, and
tucks me in – this feeds His nurturing side, and gives Him the satisfaction of knowing He is caring for me, just as
much as i care for Him in His everyday life.
I wear His marks on my body, these
are visual reminders of who i am and the commitment we share.
So i bring reassurance and reminders
that i am in His life and sharing His world, and that in turn brings Him confidence, and happiness, and contentment.
In terms of the play side of this
relationship, i can satisfy Master’s sadistic side on a day to day basis, should He wish that. Because i am always here,
if He has a burning need to pull hair, or grab a nipple, i am available. In the past, He lived on His own, and so that option
was not there.
I am also aware that play with me
is a very different dynamic to play with His other submissives, or with anyone else.
When Master plays with others, He
enjoys it, it is giving someone else a special pleasure that not many can do. This gives Him a huge buzz, and i derive much
pleasure myself from watching Him work His magic on someone else.
However, deep down inside me, there
is a little voice that says, “Oh yes but i get so much more!”
And i do, there is no question that
our play is more intense, more personal, and usually ends in mindblowing sex.
So this is an important aspect of
life which i bring to Master, the ability to satisfy His every need when we play.
I know that when we play, i am feeding
His Dominance and His control of me and my life.
I always give Master the whole girl
in everything i do for Him, but in play, the whole girl is so much more. i put my life in His hands, under His control, and
my trust is paramount to His ability to take me to places i have never been.
So then, i bring confidence and
an offering of submission, and the giving of total control to Master’s life as well.
So, in summing up and looking at
the facts, what do i bring to Master’s life?
Practical skills to ease His burden
in running a business and social club,
Housekeeping skills to make His
day run smoothly and keep His house tidy.
And then there are the emotional
ingredients:
Love, companionship, confidence,
devotion, adoration to name a few.
With those comes the feeling of
being loved and needed.
He has total control over me and
my life, He has the whole girl in His hands, to do with as He wishes. This brings the reassurance of His Dominance, and of
His need to care for me, to keep me safe.
To try and measure it and actually
define my worth is no easy task, but i never ever take my place in His life lightly, yet i know that i am worth enough for
Him to need me to stay.
I believe that its about missing
pieces, if my life was a jigsaw puzzle, Master would be the piece i was searching
for – and i believe i am His missing piece, so i bring wholeness to His
life – i complete Him.
© kim (MJ) 2007